The Assembly Hall: Part One

Whilst driving out of town Mrs Anke and I always like to look and see what new weird and wonderful names have appeared in foot high black letters on the side of the Assembly Hall.

All the letters for all the shows stored inside the Assembly Hall.

So, there was I spending a pleasant hour spent flicking some old issues of the Tunbridge Wells Magazine and seeing old Assembly Hall adverts last week and it got me thinking about the thousands of famous names that have graced our small part of the world’s stage. I therefore asked my readers, well that's you, to give me their favourite or not so favourite memories of the place. I think you'll agree there are some magic moments here.

Hang on, before we get to the memories, I also want to mention that I popped into the Assembly Hall to see if they had any old material I could peruse to discover some more, and I wasn’t disappointed. One of the most intriguing artifacts, ignoring all the photos of the stars of course, was a newspaper article from 1953 entitled Picture-Page Goes Backstage. This immediately struck me as a precursor of our Tunbridge Wells Project, where photographers go delving around behind the scenes. I also found one of the earliest programmes from a performance at the Hall, from March 1940, just a year after the building opened. I shall therefore be exploring more of the Assembly Hall in Part Two of this series soon.

Boomtown Rats in 1985 when Bob Geldof berated us as 'f***** stingy southern b******' for not donating more to the Live Aid coffers. - Fiona Horne.

Probably Russell Brand scouting women in the foyer…!! That was the night he prank called the police without realising the station was next door. It was in The Sun the next day! - @tomadolph.

The best was probably the Buddy Holly musical and the oddest was Steven Seagal. I just wanted to see him in person. I love the theatre and it reminds me how lovely and beautiful our town is. - Lene Thomas.

Took my now 'ex-wife' on our first ever date to see the circus of horrors!! It obviously worked!! For a while anyway! - @twdogshop.

We used to go to Kent Opera there - I remember wonderful versions of Cosi fan Tute, the Magic Flute and my first taste of opera - the Mariage of Figaro. I went with the composer Jeremy Dale-Roberts and his wife to see Eugene Onegin, and when I asked him what the plot would be, he said there was a man and a woman and a letter. I'm none the wiser now. With school choirs I performed at the Assembly Hall in various competitions - how nice! Never did better than second I'm afraid. Weirdest? The Radio Caroline Roadshow - with the DJs taking an axe to a vinyl copy of the Birdie Song at one stage. My aunt worked the ticket office in those days, and came to collect me in a taxi at the end, and her chums said she should see what it was like in the Hall! She thought it summed up her vision of Hell. - Jane Holland.

Best - Ian Dury. Worst - pantos (oh no it wasn't/oh yes it was), or Marlow/Dave Lee. Oh: Hawkwind got banned for many years because disgusted of TW disapproved of the lovely Stacia. - @oddlyACTIVE.

One of favs Billy Ocean - brilliant, the theatre rocked everyone up dancing, he was fab!! - @CStrudders.

Loved the panto two years ago - managed to get hit with a shaving foam pie! Great fun. Yes Aladdin! My friend was Widow Twankey - he was brilliant. Of course We sat at the back and the comic wanted to hit his mate but got me instead, I was 9months pregnant-hard not to miss! - @JaneTalkingtots.

Not sure whether any of the following will be of use for your piece about the Assembly Hall but herewith some impressions, all from the mid to late 50s:
Like another of your correspondents, going to the wrestling and seeing among others 3 great stars of the time, Jackie Pallo, Mick McManus and Kendo Nagasaki, all of whom predated Giant Haystacks and Big Daddy by about a decade I think. Almost as much fun as the wrestling were the seemingly genteel TW ladies of a certain age yelling “tear his arms off” and bashing the wrestlers with their handbags when they had the misfortune (or was it intentional) to be thrown out of the ring in front of them.
Going as a callow youth with a bunch of mates to a saturday dance with some big band or another hoping to pull but knowing deep down it would never happen. Boys all standing around the perimeter of the dance floor smoking like chimneys, girls dancing together, waltzes and foxtrots, no rock and roll yet, girls taking great enjoyment in declining one’s invitation to dance, usually made right at the end having taken the whole evening to pluck up the courage. All dressed like younger versions of our parents, no casual clothes then.
Helping, with my Sea Cadet band side drum, behind the scenes of an Am-dram production, in a play long since forgotten, that required a drum roll to be heard off stage at some critical juncture. Don’t know who the players were, rehearsals were held somewhere on the Pantiles. - Max Double.

I went to see Derek Acorah (hilariously incompetent ‘medium’ and star of Most Haunted) with Old Mother Riley and Ruth about five years ago. I’ve honestly never laughed so much in my life, although I’m pretty sure that was not the point of the stage show. He came prancing on in a white 70s suit to some bad disco music and did a little gay dance with his bouffant hair and then proceeded to do some of the most ridiculously bad medium stuff I’ve ever seen.
As an example: “Is there anyone in the audience whose grandfather was called John?” Several hands go up. “I’m thinking of a John who was once in the RAF”. Most of the hands stay up (big surprise). “He died of a condition to his physical (he has a very strange way of putting things)”.
One woman calls out: “Yes, I think it’s my granddad. He had stomach cancer.” Derek: “It’s not you, love.” Woman: “No I really think it could be because...” Derek: “IT’S NOT YOU LOVE, ALRIGHT????” We were cringing in our seats at this point.
In a separate incident, he picked on a woman in the audience who ‘had suffered from a condition to her breastal area’ and used it as a good chance to run his hands over them. At the end of the show, he beckoned to his ‘spirit guide’, called out to him “Come on Sam!” and flounced off.
He used to be on James Whale’s radio show and was just as bad on that J Total charlatan, but very, very funny.
I also saw Russell Brand there, and he got told off by the ushers for walking along the dividing barrier things and jumping off them. He also made a live phone call to the police station next door to say he was the prankster responsible for stealing the dancing lady from Dunorlan and that he had stolen it because he was dancing with it and it ‘”done a blow off”. - Hannah.

I was a young lass in the chorus of 42nd St for Complete Theatre Co.. during the dress rehearsal (during which the publicity photos where being taken) finale dance number... my arms went upwards as required by the routine (to be held until the finish) and my blouse buttons went *pop* and the camera when *click*. One of my top embarrassing stage moments; standing exposed in a star jump pose, photographed and put on the front of house pics. - Alexandra Bond.

A poster for the Assembly Hall. Kindly provided by Tonbridge Daily

Now this isn't strictly a snippet about Tonbridge but certainly in the 1960's the majority of a young Tonbridge person's socialising took place in Tunbridge Wells. This flyer was given to me by somebody who spent her teenage years here in Tonbridge, and what's a young girl got to do in 1963 when her favourite band hits the Assembly Hall ... put on her white stilettos of course and partake in a bit of back combing, get on a number 7 bus to The War Memorial, and get on over there. And, that's exactly what she did, and not only did she see her idols, swoon and get needles and pins, she also waited for their autographs. All four Searchers signed the back of the flyer.
The strange thing is that this piece of memorabilia was rediscovered just recently and I noticed that The Searchers are back on their Sixties Gold Tour at The Assembly Hall this October. That's nearly 50 years since their signatures graced the flyer. I wonder if she'll take a nostalgic trip.
An extra comment from her is:- "All I can remember is when we went back stage they 'changed' from being 'The Searchers' into sweaty, spotty, smelly, boys; like all the boys we knew. We were, however, mesmerised by their Liverpool accents, which in those days for us Southerners sounded very strange."
My own 'interesting' experience was at a Pantomime some years back. Not sure what one as we went every year with the children. On this occasion we sat in front of Ian and Victoria Hislop and family. I remember his background banter was far more humourous than what was happening on stage.
As a very young teenager (60's) I was very impressed at a concert of Arthur Brown who entered from the wings like Tarzan on a flaming rope. Wouldn't be allowed nowadays because of Health and Safety. - Suzannah and Tonbridge Daily.

I think I saw the Incredible String Band there, but I may be wrong. Would have been 1968 or thereabouts! No much of a memory!! - @daveybarnett.

In September 1939 I together with my two elder sisters were evacuated from their school in Black Heath to Tunbridge Wells. On arrival at Tunbridge Wells West Station we were transported by a fleet of taxis, to the Assembly Hall and found ourselves seated in the bottom right hand corner near the stage awaiting to be collected by future foster parent’s.
As the day went by people came in and selected children they liked the look of, by eight O’clock three lonely children remained in the hall, nobody wanted three children least of all a boy. There we sat until at long last Mrs Collins came in and agreed to take us back to her small flat in Hurstwood Road, as it happens a few yards from where I now live, it transpired Mrs Collins and her Husband were both brought up in an orphan, hence the compassion she felt.
We spent many happy hours playing on the rocks, no such thing as school,and at twelve each day Monday to Friday, we returned to the Assembly Hall where we were given our dinner along with all other evacuees.
Whenever I go in the hall my eye’s go to the right hand corner and I see three small lonely children waiting to be collected. - John E Baughan.

I remember going to see the Small Faces there and getting thrown off the stage by the bouncers. Also, the Pretty Things played there, I went to get their autographs and held Phil May's maracas (?) while he signed my book. Oh Happy Days. - Roz Plummer.

I'm not that old, but I did go to see the Sooty Show there with both Harry and Matthew Corbett presenting about 1979 I suppose it was, I was so excited I wet myself and got smacked by my Dad in front of everyone. I also thought I had been picked to go on stage and went up only to find it was the kid next to me. Also went to Panto there with Grotbags in it. Have plenty of later memories but those were my first. - Paul Philpott.

I went to see Tiswas there when they did a small tour in the early 80s. I was invited up on stage to tell a joke, and told the Englishman/Irishman/Scotsman joke about the Ghost with One Black Eye.. Tarrant was very good natured about it!
Also bunked off a field day in 1989 or 90 to see Rainbow (kids programme, not Richie Blackmore) doing a matinée [tho I doubt an evening performance would have sold many tickets].
It was essentially a pantomime show about about a golden egg which appeared to give near orgasms to anyone who rubbed it. It was great, had Geoffrey, Bungle, Zippy & George, Rod, Jane & Freddy, plus some others including the guy who did the voices for the Daleks, so some Dr Who jokes were added to the script. Best bit was doing Heads Shoulders Knees & Toes at breakneck speed. Jeremy, Sandy and myself were the only ones who kept up to the end - but then we were pitted against under 3s, mums and grandmas. - Duncan Parsons.

Went to see Hale & Pace in 1988 got front row seats, should have known better... Got picked in by the character Wally. In his Parker coat confessing undying love for me! Because I wouldn't cooperate through embarrassment he stood on my chair and addressed the audience. Lol #soembarrassed !!! - Lorraine Gettings.

Every Tuesday night during the 60's big groups came - to name a few: The Animals, The Kinks, Small Faces, Manfred Mann, Yardbirds, Georgie Fame and the infamous night when the Rolling Stones came (they were considered scruffy and dirty) Goldie & the Gingerbreads, Cliff Bennett & The Rebel Rousers to name but a few. No wonder I always had chilblains, spent hours hanging about backstage for autographs and hopefully a little peck! Oh nearly forgot, the gorgeous Walker Brothers - we all went completely wild that night. Scott Walker - what more could a girl want. - Susan Roberts.

Hinge and Brackett in about 1990/91. Some of the audience didn't realise quite what they were watching. - Carole Noakes.

I saw Hawkwind there in about 80? Then the Alarm (the shame of it), er Wilko Johnson....and much later, Steve Harley.....that's about it. Oh, and The Damned. - Pat Pope.

Did anyone ever get to see Arthur Brown & The Amazing World of Fire and Amen Corner? That was a good night. - Susan Roberts.

Didn't see them, but did hold Eden Kane's hand all the way round to the Calverley Hotel (where he was staying). That's as far as it went - honest!! - Roz Plummer.

The Crazy World of Arthur Brown, with hit song 'Fire' ;-) My favourite clip of him performing that would have to be this. I saw a collesion of bands there, including Hawkwind, Wishbone Ash, Showaddywaddy (first gig! on their 10th Anniversary tour), plus Fairport Convention more times than I care to remember. - Duncan Parsons.

Also (and this is one for the older members of the group). Who remembers a local group called The Dines - Pete Stoneman was the singer? Think they used to be support group when the big names were on in 60's. They used to practice under the Friendlies at the top of Camden Road. - Susan Roberts.

Caroline roadshows were great 'dumpys rusty nuts ' was the last band i saw at the roadshow,you always had a bad head the next day from the headbanging. - Gavin Palfrey.

I went to see hot chocolate in the 70s and went to see level 42 who recorded a record live in the assembley hall. - Melanie Crowe.

Eric Bibb. A life changing concert for me. Superb blues guitarist. - James Galpin.

Just discovered the website, it brought back memories of my childhood. My memory of the Assembly Hall must be from the 60s - for some reason my mum and I had gone to listen to Malcolm Muggeridge - can't remember why or what for. Anyway while we were there all the alarms went off and we had to evacuate the building because of a bomb scare. Not pleasant but it was just a hoax. Sticks in my memory though. - Lesley Brown.

I went to see hot chocolate in the 70s and went to see level 42 who recorded a record live in the assembley hall. - Melanie Crowe.

If you have any memories why not leave them in the comments. I have to thank the wonderful staff of the Assembly Hall and also the readers of the rather fabulous Facebook Group that is Old Pictures of Tunbridge Wells. If you have a spare week then this site will waste it with many wonderous photos. Go see it!